Mood off? Feeling ‘down’, 'fed up', or 'pressurised’?
These can all be signs of depression. Depression can make a person feel sad, empty or anxious and lose interest in work or any other activities that he/she once considered pleasurable. Feeling worthless, helpless,irritated or angry are some other symptoms of depression. Loss in appetite , insomnia,social isolation, low attendance, problems in concentrating, remembering general details or facts ,making decisions or experiencing relationship difficulties can be present in individuals experiencing depression.
What can be done?
Simply don't give yourself free time to think about your problem and make the conditions more miserable. Keep yourself indulged in some activity ( maybe something that’s fun and you would enjoy doing! ) or perhaps develop a new hobby. Try finishing your incomplete work, starting with easier tasks and then progressing towards the more difficult ones. This will help you to regain confidence and boost up your mood. Also, do not isolate yourself from people. Spend time with your friends who are supportive, they are the best when it comes to uplifting one’s mood.
"Maybe you have to know the darkness before you can appreciate the light."
"It doesn't matter how slow you go as long as you do not stop."
"Stars can’t shine without darkness."
"Once you choose hope , anything is possible."
"A positive attitude gives you power over your circumstances instead of your circumstances having power over you."
Exam stress can start when you feel you haven’t studied enough or finished the entire syllabus, or when you can't cope with revision.You might worry you’re going to fail or you won't get the grades you need for the course or job you want. Peer or family pressure can further aggravate the problem. This stress can cause uneasiness before, during, or after the examination. It is very common and affects a lot of college students. It might seem scary to talk about such exam stress or anxiety. You might feel nobody else here is feeling this way. But bottling up the stress and trying to deal with it on your own can often make it worse.
Don’t waste time thinking ‘I can’t do this’, ‘I’m useless’ or ‘I’m going to fail’. Start now and you can bring about a significant change in your result. Before the examination do not miss classes just because you need more time to prepare for the exams. On the day of examination get enough rest, eat well, and arrive at the exam hall comfortably in time. Stay confident and relaxed. Do not rush through the test, wear a watch and check it frequently. Write down what you do know and come back knowing you tried your best on the day. If you have another exam and you are not satisfied with your performance in the first exam, you may get stressed. In such a case, realize that you cannot change what has already happened, have confidence in how you performed and go for the next exam with a positive attitude. When the result comes, you might have predicted certain grades but if you don’t get that grade you might feel disappointed . Remember, exams are important – but they’re not the only way to a successful future. Just keep working hard.
"Don’t stress, do your best, forget the rest."
"Be a self motivator because nobody else is going to push you."
"Believe in yourself and all that you are, know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle."
"If we did all the things we were capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves."
"Will it be easy? nope . Worth it? Absolutely"
It’s the first away from home,without family for many students coming to college. This new, independent life might seem exciting and you may not realise when you get hit by homesickness. You‘ll start missing the familiarity of home and friends, and would not know how to cope up with these resulting emotions. This is entirely normal in the first sem and often passes within the first few weeks. It is really important to realize that you are not the only one feeling homesick and that it doesn't in any way mean you are inadequate. Homesickness can arise from a number of different factors- difficulty in adjusting to a new environment, feeling lonely or cut off from your regular support system, confusion or problems understanding a new environment/culture/language, a perceived lack of control over what’s happening around you and the list goes on. Just as homesickness doesn’t have one precise cause, it also manifests in many different ways: constantly wanting to call friends or family, critically comparing everything in your new environment to what’s “normal” for you and withdrawing from or rejecting the local social life.
Homesickness won’t go away overnight, it takes work and effort to get through it, and it can sometimes seem impossible, but it is doable, and well worth the trouble. Once you remove the homesick glasses, you’ll be able to see everything around you in a new, more positive light. If you happen to be a localite, we will recommend you not to visit home very frequently, so that you can spend more time with your new friends. Make a real effort to join various clubs. This might feel very difficult, but the more you feel part of campus life, the less homesick you will feel. Talk to your parents regularly but not too much. Tell them about all the new things happening, this will not only help you feel good, but will also help lessen your parent’s worries. Try adapting to the new culture. Delhi has various kinds of places to explore, go and try them out. You’ve worked very hard to come here, do not let homesickness drive away all the wonderful things waiting for you in your new college life.
"Life's a journey. Keep moving !"
"We don't call it homesick. We call it missing home. There's not a sickness involved, it’s a state of mind."
"Either you run the day, or the day runs you !"
"Don’t wait, the time will never be just right ! Stop complaining."
"Never let the things you want make you forget the things you have."
The feeling of being lonely occurs to most of us at some point in our lives. It is a confusing emotion and often very difficult to understand.
The solution? Make friends! Take part in activities you are interested in, whatever it be, and you will meet new people. Don’t compare them with your old school friends, try to understand and accept new people. Don’t try to change yourself in order to ‘fit-in’, just be yourself and see how fast you’ll make some really great friends. Try to blend in your hostel, make friends there. They’ll be there to help you when you need.
"Sometimes you have to stand alone, just to make sure that you still can."
"Don't feel lonely. The entire universe in inside you."
"The hardest walk is walking alone. But it is also the walk that makes you the strongest."
"Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise."
Here at IITD we have students from different cultural and regional backgrounds. Many students are not well accustomed to hindi/english and thus find it hard to cope up in daily life, be it socially or academically. All this might cause a feeling of inferiority or isolation from people.
But friends, this is not a problem if you put in just a little bit of effort. It takes time to adjust to a new culture, learn and understand a new language but then see it as an opportunity to learn something new. The best and the most effortless way is to interact with people, make friends- not just from your culture but from others too. Widen and diversify your friend circle. You’ll get to learn so many new things from them. Hindi is the most widely spoken language among students, but english is important too. Lessons are taught in english, interviews and almost all academics related work is done in english. So be it hindi or english, try to get a command over both the languages as they are equally important. Try attending language workshops. Do not hesitate to ask others for help, be it your classmates or seniors. A little work and language will never become a problem for you.
"Don't compare yourself with anyone in the world. If you do so, you are insulting yourself."
"A negative mind will never give you a positive life."
"No culture can live if it attempts to be exclusive."
"The Beauty of the world lies in the diversity of the people."
"We all are different. Don’t judge. Understand.
Alcohol is often associated with fun, being sociable and with celebrations. Although alcohol may initially uplift your mood and make you feel “happy”, it acts as a depressant in the long run. The more you drink, or the more often you drink, the more you need to drink the next time to feel the same effects. Therefore, drinking occasionally can turn into a drinking habit in no time. If you feel some of the following happening to you, it is time to take action: You are drinking regularly. You crave for a drink now and then and the urge is sometimes uncontrollable. People around you are telling you to alter your drinking habits; their relationship with you is changing.
What to do? Gradually decrease intake. Set limits for yourself that you think you can stick to. Get involved with a healthy, distracting activity, such as physical exercise or a hobby that doesn't involve drinking. Or, instead of fighting the feeling, accept it and ride it out without giving in, knowing that it will soon crest like a wave and pass. Know your "no." You're likely to be offered a drink at times when you don't want one. Have a polite, convincing "no, thanks" ready. The faster you can say no to these offers, the less likely you are to give in.
"Quitting alcohol is tough and rough but it is worth enough."
"The chains of alcohol are too light to be felt until they are too strong to be broken."
"Be very serious about no alcohol, no drugs. Life is too beautiful."
"Alcohol is not the Answer. It just makes you forget the Question."
"Alcohol : Temporary Fun, with Permanent Consequences.
Anger becomes problematic when it is too easily triggered or too prolonged, and then it impacts your concentration, mood, relationships, self-esteem, work and social life.
How to control your anger? Use the L.I.F.E model: L –Develop the habit of listening to the other person also. Try to understand the issue from their perspective as well. I –Tell the other person why you feel angry; give them the "I" statements. For example: "I feel angry when you make arrangements without telling me and expect me to go along. I feel as if you have no respect for me". Rather than 'You have no respect for me, it's no wonder I get so angry". This will prevent things from escalating and turning into a fight. F –Freedom. Allow people the freedom to deal with their problems as they see fit. It's no good getting cross because they can't see the wisdom of your approach; it just makes things worse. E –Everyone's a winner! Continue to negotiate until both sides feel they have been heard and have got something out of the situation. Making someone feel a loser is only storing up future troubles.
"Great anger is more destructive than a sword."
"Bear with the fault of others as you would have them bear with yours."
"Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be."
"Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame."
"Two things a man should never be angry at: what he can help, and what he cannot help."
What is anxiety? Anxiety is a normal emotional and physiological response to feeling threatened. The experience of anxiety can range from mild uneasiness and worry to severe panic. At a reasonable level, short bursts of anxiety can motivate us and enhance our performance, but if anxiety becomes too severe or chronic, it can become debilitating.
How can you manage anxiety? Review the stressful situation and look for a solution. Don’t just get overwhelmed by the problem. See if you can do anything to improve your situation. If yes, don’t wait. If no, relax knowing you cannot do anything about it and accept the consequences. If anxiety becomes chronic, work on meditation techniques. Devote some time daily to meditation.
"When thinking about life, remember this: No amount of guilt can solve the past, and no amount of anxiety can change the future."
"Our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strengths."
"Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems."
"It’s OKAY to be scared. Being scared means you’re about to do something really, really brave."
"Do not let your difficulties fill you with anxiety, after all it is only in the darkest nights that stars shine more brightly."
Concentration has been defined as "the ability to direct one's thinking in whatever direction one would intend". Increasing concentration: STOP: If you ever notice your thoughts wondering, say STOP to yourself and picture the word STOP in your mind. Then gently bring back your attention to where you want it to be. Worry time: Set aside a specific period of the day when you will address all your worries. Whenever an anxiety or distracting thought enters your mind during the day, banish it until your next worry time, and re-focus on to what you are supposed to be doing.
"Concentration is the root of all the higher abilities in a man."
"Concentration and mental toughness are the margins of victory."
"Thought is energy. Active thought is active energy; concentrated thought is a concentrated energy. Thought concentrated on a definite purpose becomes power."
"Concentration comes out of a combination of confidence and hunger."
"Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus."
Conflict is a normal, and even healthy, part of relationships. When a conflict is mismanaged, it can harm the relationship. But when handled in a respectful and positive way, a conflict provides an opportunity for growth, ultimately strengthening the bond between two people. How to deal with conflicts Identify the problem: To find a solution, the problem should first be understood properly. Pinpoint exactly what troubles you. Learn to listen: After identifying the problem, it is important that you listen to what your counter-part has to say. Try to understand and think from their perspective as well. Don’t just complain, solve: Complaining about the problem will take you nowhere. It is important that you collectively look for a solution that suits the both of you.
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand, they listen with the intent to reply."
"The goal of conflict resolution is not victory or defeat. It is reaching a certain level of understanding and letting go of our need to be right."
"Peace is not the absence of conflict but the ability to cope with it."
"You are always responsible for how you ACT, regardless of how you FEEL. Remember that."
"Differences can be the sources of creativity, or they can serve to divide."
What is procrastination? The avoidance of doing a task which needs to be done - postponing until tomorrow what can be done today. Why do people procrastinate? The reasons for procrastination range from not being able to prioritise to anxiety and difficulty in concentrating. Ultimately, procrastination leads to panic at the last moment and unnecessary stress that could have been avoided had the work been done on time. How to avoid Procrastination? Write down what you have to do, when and then prioritize. List making can make you feel more in control. Set aside 15 minutes daily which you will devote exclusively to the task you are putting off. Once started it is often easier to keep going. Make a start on an easy task then switch quickly to a difficult one. Plan rewards for when you have accomplished something
"A year from now you may wish you had started today."
"If you don’t pay appropriate attention to what has your attention, it will take more of your attention than it deserves."
"If you want to make an easy job seem mighty hard, just keep putting off doing it."
"Do the hard jobs first. The easy jobs will take care of themselves."
"You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."
Exercise during the day, preferably in the late evening before dinner. Do not exercise within 4 hours of going to bed. Aerobic exercise (not necessarily 'aerobics', but the type that gets you sweating for 20 minutes or more) is best, but 45 minutes to an hour of brisk walking will work. Regular Bedtime / Wake Time to go to bed and get up at regular times, even if you are tired in the morning. Do not vary your time of going to bed or getting up. However if you have consistent sleep problems, try getting up half an hour earlier in the morning than your usual time; it may help you get to sleep that night. Meals before Sleep: No heavy meals right before bedtime. Avoid stimulating or spicy foods. Eat a small snack about two hours before bedtime. A good choice would be a banana and a glass of milk. Some people also find drinking a glass of milk 30 minutes before sleeping is helpful. No Stimulants. Avoid caffeine, sugar or other stimulants within 4 hours of going to bed. Avoid even moderate use during the day. If you must have some, do so only in the morning and have small amounts. Sleep Restriction: Cut down on time in bed not sleeping. Estimate average total hours currently actually sleeping, i.e.- 7 hours. Naps: Only take quick 'power' naps no longer than 20 minutes and no later than the afternoon.
"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."
"The woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep."
"As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well spent brings happy death."
If you regularly use tobacco products – especially by smoking. If you regularly exceed guidelines for low risk drinking of alcoholic beverages. If you use substances such as cannabis, cocaine, amphetamine-type stimulants (including ecstasy and “designer drugs”), inhalants, non prescribed sedatives or sleeping pills, hallucinogens, or opioids.
Not only is intake of drugs illegal, it also harms your body to an extent that it can even destroy your entire career. You’ll get an answer to this question by writing down any problems you think your substance use has caused over the last 3 months. Think about what substance(s) you use and the problems you think it might be causing. You might find that one substance causes several problems. Eg. arguments with your family or partner, problems with your health – like not sleeping properly, feeling depressed, or feeling anxious or agitated.
First convince yourself completely on why you need to stop. If you think you need help, visit the SCS or a psychiatrist who visits IIT Delhi once every week on a Tuesday from around 5.30-7.30pm, however prior appointment is needed to be taken from the IIT hospital. SCS is one place where nobody will judge you, and will help you stop being one. You need to gradually cut down on your intake and don’t think you can do it alone.
Make sure you have a healthy diet and get plenty of sleep Keep active and establish a regular exercise routine – walking, yoga, the gym. Drink plenty of water and other non-alcoholic drinks Keep busy with non substance use activities – take up a new hobby or spend more time on an old one. Make non using friends Give yourself non substance use treats occasionally Put the money you save into a special fund to save up for something you really need or want
Don't be shy about asking for help. It doesn't mean you're weak, it only means you're wise :) Asking for help is a sign of strength!
Your ego might get in the way You might think that others will make fun of you You might think that the problem is not “that big” And…any other self-comforting “stupid” reason, that prevents you from asking for help, until it’s too late! First things first, the sole purpose of this Self Help Section is - a place where one can find the solution of a problem through self realisation. We are simply trying to help you introspect and come up with a solution :) , and so does SCS ! You shouldn’t be shy/reluctant to approach the SCS too. Please note that all the things that you talk about to the counsellor is completely Private and Confidential.. So, you don’t have to worry on this issue. It’s like – “What happens in SCS, stays in SCS”. Damn! What to do?? You need to understand that we are social beings and we all need help at some point of time or the other. So don't shy away from asking for help. No one ever is self-made. Consider one problem that you are facing right now and just think about whom can you ask for help for that particular problem, and as simple as it gets, just go and ask that person. Sharing your thoughts and emotions with your friends about any issue, always works! Nothing happens until the pain of remaining the same outweighs the pain of change!
Often most of the students say this line – “Yaar sirf 10 min aur phone use kar leta hun phir apne kaam karunga.” And then end up with a stupid question – “Why should i go out and discover new things when internet gives me all the entertainment i want ?” With great power of freedom, comes great responsibility of exploring things. In their quest to get a college, people often sacrifice things like watching movies, TV series, etc. and with now with Wi-Fi and LAN at their disposal, they often tend to use it for getting the things they sacrificed and hence end up sticking to their phones/laptops 24*7. Self help: Look internet isn't the room you want to be living in your whole life. Yes it can be addicting and you won't even notice. IIT offers a lot of things just for you, so that your college life doesn't remain monotonous. Internet shouldn't be your master. The more time one spends on internet, the more you lose out on the college life's entertainment. There are various things that can be done to get out of this cage. Take breaks: You can’t get rid of anything immediately. Try to take a 15-20 mins break after every hour of internet usage. Use this time to your good. Take a walk, clean up your messy room, chat with your friends or write letter on paper. Stick to this schedule. You might seem a bit reluctant at first but believe me, once you get used to it you will enjoy doing this more. Switch off the notifications options: Generally, because of so many social sites one or two notifications pop up every half an hour which forces us to check our phone and we end up using it way too longer. Switching off the notifications surely helps in reducing distractions. Develop a new hobby: You mostly tend to deviate towards internet when you don’t have anything else to do at hand. Try exploring things and sticking to one or two of them to which you can go to in your free time. With this you will not only get rid of your addiction problem but will also develop new qualities. Ask friends for help: There are many people around you with the same problem, help each other out. Keep a check on each other and when having nothing in hand to do, go out and play some sport. Set a timer: Note down the time you spend everyday surfing net and try every day’s noted time to be lesser than the previous day’s time. It will be tough in the beginning but gradually you will notice that your time spent using internet has dropped by a large margin. So now lets see how we can manage limited use of internet / video gaming and yet make our day happy fruitful and complete in a 24 hour day cycle.
During your stay at IIT, you’ll make loads of new friends. While you may get attached to some of them very closely, a few bumps along the road are inevitable. There will be times when your relationship, be it with your best friend or your girlfriend/boyfriend, will suffer and won’t be as smooth as ever. These are precisely the times that test your relationship, and all it takes to pass the test is patience and the ability to listen and express your opinions. First of all, whenever you feel something wrong in your relationship, pinpoint exactly what it is that is troubling your relationship with your partner. If you cannot identify the problem, talk to your partner and discuss. While talking: Make your partner realize that you are in for a logical discussion and are ready to listen (with an open mind) to whatever they have to say. Make sure you listen actively to what your counterpart has to say. If there is something you need to justify, wait for your turn. Don’t interrupt. Once your partner is through, tell them your side of the story and why what you feel is right. In case there is a difference of opinion, sort it out by listening and discussing. Your main objective through this discussion should be to achieve a logical solution rather than a solution suitable to you. Successful relationships often require sacrifices and compromises. If you still cannot solve the problem, see if there is anything you can do to protect your relationship. Get rid of that ego and call your partner for an appointment. Choose a public spot (e.g. a park or a library) to sort things out so that you’re embarrassed in case you raise your voice. However, if your partner fails to compromise and listen, make them realize how you tried your best to protect the relationship and make it work. Now, even if your relationship ends you’ll have a sense of satisfaction of having tried your best to protect it. Post break up symptoms, however, are inevitable. Headache, loss of appetite, inability to focus on anything else are all common aftereffects of a broken relationship. Fortunately, there are ways that can help you get over this crisis. Some of them are: Give yourself some time: Don't overreact and take this to be the end of your life. Accept the fact that it'll take time for you to get over this relationship. Ultimately, time heals everything. Talk to someone who cares: This can really ease you up. Open up to somebody you're comfortable with and tell them everything. Talking about your relationship will make you feel better and help you recover faster. Distract yourself: Pursue your favourite hobbies. Do things that make you happy. That may be as simple as painting or going for a game of football. You will realise that life has a lot more to offer. Avoid disrespecting your ex-partner via social and personal destructive ways of mudslinging tactics and immoral, unethical and disrespectful ways, as it will just satisfy or justify your ego and self in front of your friends but not help you overcome the broken heart constructively Learn lessons: Take every broken relationship as a lesson to be learnt. This will also help you build stronger relationships in future.
I Have always been among the toppers of my school, Will I be able to sustain my position in IIT? Is life at IIT stressful from an academic point of view? High Achiever Issues are a common problem among the students of IIT. They have always seen the bright side of the moon and hence fear seeing the dark(that actually one may think it is). The fear of losing everything can cause some successful people to become paralyzed by fear. Earlier you were wanting to be into top 1% of the 100%, now you'll be wanting to be in the top of that 1%. Not at all..Just before asking this question let us remind our condition just a couple of years ago, during the JEE times. Recall the enthusiasm we had, our commitment, .... the list becomes endless. But as soon as we step into these dens we totally become new selves at once.There are too many things to do in here that you find yourself to be in an open world free from any parental pressure and start to divert from studies which is absolutely fine. The academics at IIT are pretty cool ,you just need to attend your classes and have a reasonable ear to the professor. But even doing this simple thing turns out to be a very big thing in a course of few semesters sometimes even in the first semester itself. Then the answer to the question sounds 'YES'. Lets analyze the students who just do this simple task(mentioned before). This class of people are addressed by several different names 'maggus' 'ghissus', indeed they aren't anything like that. Of course there are people who are genuinely concerned about their CGPA and are simply in love with the subjects that they study(most of us are not) and these people spend more time studying and even if they don't , they turn out to be better than others. You need to understand that you are studying in IIT Delhi which is the dream of probably every Engineering Student in the country. You are going to experience such a level of academics that further separates these top students into low scorers and high scorers. But , these things are not to be worried about as One must always remember that One is still better than the best of most colleges in the country. In Simple Words, There are hurdles at each and every point those who crosses it say it was challenging and those who not they will say it was stressful and finally give up. You must know that Interests and Achievements in extra curricular activities are well recognized outside IIT and are given equal importance as academics. The Level of exposure that one gets here is so precious that if utilized yields prolong success. Bright minds will always be bright , it is just that the field changes.
"Successful People do not worry of what others are doing."
"The value of a college education is not the learning of any facts but the training of the mind to think."
"Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up."
"Success in life is not for those who run fast, but for those who keep running and always on the move."
"You may encounter many disappointments. Be strong. Tell yourself, “I am good enough, I will try again."
College feels like freedom, doesn’t it? No one to tell you what to do; you are on your own. It feels good, but that doesn’t mean you start neglecting your parents. Remember that they are the ones who’ve made you capable enough to be where you are and what you are now. Don’t keep them in the dark regarding anything, be it academics or personal life. Whatever you do, they are the ones who will always be there for you. Regularly call them, tell them about all the new things you see here, all the new people you meet and what all you learn here everyday. Their lives revolve around you and nothing makes them happier than hearing from you, knowing that you are well and enjoying all that this prestigious college is offering you. But this doesn’t mean you start hiding your problems with them. You might come at a stage where you feel confused or angry or upset or any such emotion which is causing you distress. They know you inside out and will always understand your feelings, so do tell them! Maybe when you yourself cannot understand what you are feeling, they might and they’ll definitely help you. Once in college, you get busy and often forget calling back home. But don’t forget how much your family misses you, and so make sure you contact them often- that’s the least you can do to fill in the void you’ve left back home. Your family loves you, trusts you and will always support all your decisions, so never leave them out of the loop!